Before we discuss what qualities and skill sets that make for a good coach, we need to first acknowledge how very difficult the coaching profession can be. While everyone see the high level coaches, making great livings in prof sports, the reality is the majority of coaching is done on a part time volunteer basis and even when there is some form of remuneration or compensation, coaches are overseen and supported by volunteers. It’s an occupation that is most often done in a public fishbowl. In other words, if you coach, then you are in a highly visible position that continually exposes you to the public’s scrutiny and evaluation. It’s one of those professions where individuals with little or no experience and more importantly, little or no insight into the reality surrounding a team can regularly weigh in on what kind of a job they think a coach is doing. Often the "feedback" is unsolicited, unwanted and more an issue of payback or frustration than an actual objective evaluation.
When it comes to judging your job performance, everyone seems to be an expert and have the “qualifications” to criticize you. Fans, parents, students, alumni, the media, and the team’s organization or administration all seem at the ready to offer you either the thumbs up or thumbs down signal. What’s even more frustrating for a coach is that so much of this external judgment comes from individuals who don’t seem to have a clue about you, your players, or what you’re trying to accomplish with the team. Coaching is also one of those jobs where your professional effectiveness is almost always narrowly measured by something that is very often totally out of your control: winning and losing. In many ways you can be a bad or ineffective coach, yet because you are lucky enough to have great players on your squad, you win all the time. Because of this external record you are considered in your profession to be a “great” coach. Similarly, you can be a wonderful coach and teacher but because of a lack of player talent, luck, or other circumstances beyond your control such as player injuries, your won-loss record is just mediocre and, as a consequence of this, you’re seen as an ineffective coach. As I how often shared with groups to whom I present about the role of coaching and leadership, the quality of a coach is often measured and judged by the outcome of decisions and not the quality of the decisions themselves. So what make a "good coach " ? Opinions will vary and I am a believer that the real measure of a coaches ability is very dependent on the level at which he or she coaches. Could a coach with experience uniquely at the highly competitive or professional level, coach 8 year old kids on a recreational team... I will let you answer that as you feel is best. If you’re an athlete then what follows MIGHT help you objectively evaluate how your coach measures up. It will give you some valuable information that will allow you to more intelligently evaluate how your coach conducts him/herself in relation to you and your teammates. In this way it will give you the ability to better “reality test” the coach-athlete situation that you currently find yourself in. It's very often quite difficult for an athlete to really know if there’s something wrong with him or the coach. Most often in emotional coach-athlete interactions, the athlete typically comes away feeling badly about him/herself. Hopefully the information that follows will help you better understand what is really going on and help you not blame yourself for things that you shouldn’t. If you’re a parent of an athlete, maybe my the thoughts shared here will help you get a good idea of what to look for in individuals coaching teams your kids are involved with. How do the better coaches conduct themselves? How do they treat their athletes? How do they interact with you as the parent? How do they deal with winning and losing? How do the better coaches deal with mistakes and failures? Parents need to be educated as much as possible about their child’s sport and coaches in order to help their son or daughter have the best and happiest experience possible. If you’re a coach, well hopefully some of what I might share will resonate with you and if nothing else, cause you to reflect on your coaching style and level of commitment. There is no one way of coaching, It's about being able to adapt, adjust and react to different teams athletes. I am pulling from my experiences but also from years if interacting with other coaches and feeding off of their experiences. The very best coaches get their athletes to believe in themselves. Good coaches inspire their players to do more than they think they can. In fact, anyone in any capacity of teaching or leadership have the chance to do this. They get individuals under their charge to explorer and entertain possibilities that stretch the limits of their beliefs and imagination. Part of this involves building the athlete up rather than knocking him down. Good coaches always build self-esteem rather than undermine it. This self-esteem building is not a gimmick nor is it done artificially. In other words the coach doesn’t praise a mediocre effort. He/she simply makes it a practice to catch his/her athletes doing things right. The good coach doesn’t get caught up in playing head games that leave the athlete questioning his/her abilities. Coaches should never use embarrassment or humiliation as tools to push their athletes to do better. They understand that embarrassing or humiliating a young athlete for a mistake, failure or short-coming is an aggressive assault on that athlete that doesn't build mental toughness or enhance performance! There is nothing educational or constructive about it. It tears down that athlete and grossly undermines his/her self-esteem and creates performance problems. I've covered this point before but successful coaches in sport are also successful in being life coaches to one degree or other. A good coach understands that what he/she is teaching goes far beyond the X’s & O’s. This kind of coach does not just teach the skills, technique and strategy within the narrow confines of the sport. Instead he/she looks for opportunities where the more important life lessons can be taught such as mastering hardship, handling and rebounding from failures and setbacks, trusting your teammates, sacrificing individual needs for the benefit of the group, emotionally dealing with winning and losing, good sportsmanship, fair play, honesty, integrity, etc. Successful coaches do not let their egos get caught up as part of the outcome or process. It is and should always be about the athletes. The best coaches are mentally healthy enough to know that they are NOT their performances, regardless of what others around them may say. They do not feel diminished as an individual when their teams fail nor do they feel that much better about themselves when their squads succeed. These individuals understand that coaching is only one thing of many that they do and therefore they do not let this one thing solely define themselves as a person. Coaches who get into trouble with their athletes do so because they are emotionally more vulnerable and tend to feel threatened by a loss or failure. Their egos are on the line whenever these individuals compete and therefore they feel like they have much more to lose. Many blatant coaching mistakes come directly from the coach’s overemphasis on the game’s outcome because that individual self-esteem is too caught up with this outcome. A good coach recognizes and understands the differences that might exist among their athletes. Coaches should have a basic understanding that each athlete on their team is different in attitude, personality, response-ability, sensitivity and how they handle criticism and adversity. These coaches take the time to get to know each athlete’s individual differences and styles. They then hand-tailor what they say to, and how they treat this athlete to achieve maximum coaching effectiveness. They know that while one athlete may respond well to a hard edge and raised voice, this approach may totally shut another one down. Really effective coaches take the time to get to know the athlete as a person. They take an interest in the athlete’s life off the field, court or ice. They don't see personal, academic or social problems as a distraction to the job of coaching. They view “outside problems” as an opportunity to further build a relationship with the athlete. This kind of caring is never lost on the athlete. Coaches who take an interest in the athlete’s total life are more trusted and respected than those who don’t. As a result, coaches who really care about the athlete as a person find that their athletes are more motivated and work harder. You can’t ever separate the athlete as a performer from who he/she is as a person. Coaches need to be flexible in their preparation and interaction with athletes. They need to approach their coaching by continuously looking for a better way to reach each athlete. When an athlete struggles to learn something the better coaches do not look at this as a “learning disability” and blame the athlete for their incompetence. Instead they approach it as a “teaching opportunity” and therefore change how they are presenting the material to that athlete. If one approach doesn’t work, then they try another until they figure out the best way to reach that particular athlete. Just because that athlete may not be responding to your coaching does not mean that he/she has an attitude or commitment problem. Coaches who are rigid, who continually adopt the attitude that “it’s my way or the highway” are far less effective than those coaches who have mastered the fine art of being flexible. Understand here that flexibility does NOT mean being a pushover always giving in. You can be flexible and strong at the same time. The great coaches are generally also great communicators. The days of the coach is always right and athletes do what they are told are over. Effective coaches understand that communication is a two-way street and involves a back and forth between coach and athlete. Bad coaches think that communication is a one-way street. You talk and the athletes listen. Instead, effective communication entails that you as a coach carefully listen to what your athletes are saying. Unless you carefully listen to them when they talk then you won’t have a clue as to what your athletes are really saying or how to best help them. Far too many coaches are too busy countering in their head what their athletes are saying to actually hear them. If you can’t learn how to listen then you will never truly be effective in reaching your players. As a good communication it is important to be empathetic and tuned into your players. I often say that as I get older and the average age of my athletes stays the same, it is harder and harder to fully relate to my athletes but it is important to find ways to connect with them. When you are empathetic you leave your athlete feeling that you as his/her coach deeply understands. This goes a long way in building athlete loyalty, self-esteem and motivation. Keep in mind that being empathetic doesn’t necessarily mean that you are an emotional pushover. You can have the ability to understand where your players are coming from and still make the coaching decisions that you feel are necessary. Coaches who lack the ability or don’t take the time to tune into the emotions of their athletes because they mistakenly believe that “all this emotional crap” is a total waste, end up inadvertently undermining their best coaching efforts. Effective coaches are able to interact with athletes and yes even parents in a manner where they don't take things personally by still manage to convey the message that in end , it is the coach who is responsible for the group. They make it a regular practice to communicate with the parents and educate them about the sport and the role that they need to play on the team. Coaching success at the youth level often depends upon getting parents to work with you, not against you. Do not wait for a problem or crisis before you decide that it’s time to actually approach your parents. Do so right from the beginning of the season and do it often. Let them know about their support role on the team. Help them understand that their job is not to motivate or coach their child. Teach them what are appropriate and inappropriate behaviors at games and on the sidelines. Educate them about the sport and what it takes to excel. Explain your philosophy about competition and playing time. Be open to feedback in a non-defensive manner. Understand that part of being a good communicator is being open to negative feedback and criticism because within this feedback there are pieces of information that any coach can use to becoming a better, more successful coach. Coaches should ensure that the environment around the team is a positive and emotionally safe one. As a coach it is important to always remember that the emotional climate on the team dramatically affects how players practice and perform. It is your role as a coach to directly and immediately deal with scapegoating, bullying, ostracism and petty jealousies that sometimes arise between players. They give a very clear message that cruelty and mistreatment of others will not be tolerated and are counter to the mission of the team. As a consequence this kind of coach creates an atmosphere of safety on the team that is absolutely crucial for optimal learning and peak performance. Keeping the point above in mind, coaches need to continually find ways to inspire their athletes to do better and push the perceptions of their limits, dare to dream so to speak. Find ways to inspire athletes to believe in themselves by continually putting them in situations which challenge their limiting beliefs. Good enough is not good enough, if they can do something once, they can do it again. Don't be afraid ways to get the athletes out of their comfort zones. However, in challenging athletes, good coaches are always also willing to challenges themselves. Understand that regardless of past success, you can always learn new and better ways. Over time, things change, the attitude of athletes, expectations, technology, the reality of the competitive environment, etc so a a coach looking to have a sustained relevance, be willing to seek out opportunities to improve yourself. Be passionate in everything you do related to coaching. Like any role, there will be part of the role you enjoy and others, not so much. However let you passion for the sport, for the role of coach and for the reward of seeing the athlete achieve their objectives be the force that pushes you over obstacles, beyond setbacks and through frustration until you achieve success. Passion is infectious, motivational and inspiring. Successful coaches need to be honest and conduct themselves with integrity. While you may thing that some of your action go unnoticed , few actually do. How a coaches conduct themselves in relation to their athletes, the parents, opponents, the referees, spectators and the general public is never lost on their athletes. A good coach always strive to demonstrate the very best in character and class. This is not always easy as we are all human and like anyone else, life's frustration can get to us. Finally and in my opinion most importantly, The best coaches make the sport fun for their athletes. Sports at the most basic level remain games, and games by definition are meant to be fun. Find creative ways to integrate this fun in different ways over the course of the season. When an athlete is enjoying him/herself, that athlete is loose and relaxed. Since loose and relaxed are two of the most crucial ingredients to peak performance, it is in your best interests as a coach to find innovative ways to keep your athletes smiling. Hopefully some will have found this post interesting at a minimum and helpful to some extend for others.
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AuthorAfter many years of coaching at various levels and with different teams, I thought I would share some of my experiences and thoughts about coaching. Archives
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