eI have previous written about how I got into coaching and my progress through the various teams and environments, as well as the importance it holds in my life and has held in my own personal development. I want go into those aspects again but I do invite anyone scrolling through this article to visit earlier posts to know a little more about me if you haven't read them previously.
I have had the privilege of coaching in the sport I love for almost 30 years. Looking back, it doesn't matter how I got into coaching, it is just a great outcome that I did. With every different team or level I have coached at, the position came with expectations and responsibilities. With hindsight and with the benefit of experience and a greater sense of self-awareness, I can honestly say that I probably did not fully appreciate all the responsibilities that came with being a coach of teenagers or young adults. I covered this topic from the point of view of advocated for women's soccer and the who idea of eliminating gender bias and pushing for more substantial gender equity, but these are larger picture and philosophical issues and it is important to remember the impact that a coach can have directly on the athletes right in front of you. As I enter my 16th year at Concordia, working with student-athletes transitioning from teenagers to young adults and beyond, I try and keep in mind that while my role is to coach them as soccer players, my actions and the way I interact with them, can impact their lives in different ways. Coaching is so much more than teaching student athletes how to play a sport, it’s also an opportunity to help develop a young person’s character. I can’t think of more important work than someone influencing young people, The influence that we can sometimes have on our athletes is exponential. because it’s meaningful and has a huge impact. How we contribute to an individuals development can lead to how they in the future as they progress through their lives, will interact with others and hopefully might motivate them to give back. As coaches, we get to share a passion about using the games we love to make a significant difference in the lives of others by hopefully teaching our athletes to be responsible and dedicated individuals who have the tools to make good life decisions and excel in whatever endeavors they pursue. We can use sports to teach leadership, perseverance, diligence, determination, and build character and confidence. Coaching is about helping young people be something more than what they think they can become. It’s about building human beings and helping young people become better citizens. Coaching while for many can't be a profession, on my opinion is definitely a vocation. If you lose sight of the privilege you have in being able to coach, when it becomes about you and your success and not about the athletes you are tasked with leading, then is it time to move on. Now, at this point, let me interject a moment of reality and clarity. If someone were to poll all the athletes that I have come in contact with during my time at Concordia, I am quite sure that you would get a varying degree of feedback as to the impact or perceived impact each of them feel that I had on their lives. It would be easy to dismiss their opinions under the guise that they it was all on them, that they didn't understand the opportunity and privilege they were getting etc. However the reality is that like with any type of interpersonal interactions, it can happen that two people simply don't connect. Yes of course, some of the student-athlete's frustration stem from the frustration of not feeling they got sufficient playing time, or were recognized for their true ability but the fact is that the student-athlete experience is not always a positive one for everyone. As a coach and as a person, I am always disappointed when I see someone that has been a member of the team, quit before they graduate or even if they remain a student-athlete throughout their university years, leave with a feeling of frustration or sense of having wasted their time. Of course we always hope that everyone we have the chance to coach, loves the experience, thinks we have a great positive impact on them and most important is convinced that we have given them tools that will help them be successful in the next chapters of their lives. However, reality is that we can't please everyone. As coaches, we can only do what we feel is best, but should always been open to adapting and changing. Even after 27 years in coaching, I am always open to new ideas, new ways of interacting with my athletes. The good news is that often, years after they have moved on, when I have had the chance to cross paths with former athletes and they have had some life experiences away from the sport and university, many have overcome their resentment or disappointment and luckily in many cases they realize with hindsight that it wasn't as bad as they believed.... it happens, but there remain those that are still bitter and always will be. When I took my first coaching certification course, they instructors first words to the group were " remember, without athletes, there is no need for coaches, you are there for them, not the reverse. You will need to adapt your ways to their needs" . These are words that I have tried ( sometimes successfully sometimes not so much ) to guide my actions by. As I get older and the age gap between myself and my athletes continues to grow, I need to be very aware that things chance, expectations and behaviors today are very different than when I was in university and it is important that as coach I make sure to keep the environment around the team relevant, motivating and relate-able for the athletes. Thinking that athletes should follow the coach simply because he or she is the coach is a recipe for failure. My time as a coach is coming to and end, I still love it but realize that the years are numbered. All I can do is remain true to myself, offer the student-athletes the best possible experience and hope it provides them with something they can take with them into the rest of their lives.
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AuthorAfter many years of coaching at various levels and with different teams, I thought I would share some of my experiences and thoughts about coaching. Archives
January 2023
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