If you read my blog regularly, you have probably seen quite a few posts about how important coaching is to me, how it has impacted my life, how much I enjoyed end, and various topics of that nature The truth is that coaching has been a big part of my life for over half of my lifetime, and when I made the decision to walk away and retire from active coaching, like anyone who make a significant change in their life, I wondered what it would like, how would I replace the long hours, would I find something that I could be a passionate about.
The majority of my posts in relation to coaching are from the perspective of how I will missed it or how great everything about it was, but truth be told, like with anything, there were negatives, there were things I will absolutely not miss about coaching and as the title of today's post states, the world didn't end when coaching did. A while back, I posted a piece reflecting on comparing my work with my coaching career, where they intertwine or where they divert, which one better defines. If you want to revisit it, you can find it via this link work-is-what-i-do-coaching-is-who-i-am-or-is-it.html But back to today's post................... For a while there soccer and soccer coaching seemingly ran my life. I spent nearly 3 decades coaching with three organizations, most significantly at the university level with Concordia, if you read my posts regularly, you know all this. For a majority of my coaching career it was pretty close to a year round commitment, practices, games, season planning, scouting recruiting.... that was the soccer requirements. It also meant planning vacations around soccer schedules, eating microwaved meals late in the evening after practices or games, getting home after midnight after games and having to get up early the next morning, missed family dinner, birthday parties, outing with friends, and so much more. Now, let's be clear, that was my choice, it came with the territory of being a high level coach. Then, this summer, it all ended. My time at Concordia came to a close and as I had always planned, once I was done coaching university, I would retire from active coaching. It represents a big lifestyle change for me, however it certainly does not mean I know have no life. Here are a few of the positives changes that retiring from coaching has for me. I don't miss it. That's right, as much as it was a big part of my life, I don't miss coaching. I get back at a decent hour after work, having time to get things done around the house, spend time with my wife, not only do I get to have dinner at a decent hour, I get to enjoy the pleasure of preparing it. I have discovered that I enjoy cooking, I enjoy planning a meal, preparing it and actually eating it in the company of my wife fresh off the stove or out of the oven and not microwaved and reheated. Since retiring, I have only attended one game. It was a game that the Stingers hold annually in memory of a former player who died tragically and raise donations for the Children's Hospital. Just as an aside you can read a little about it via this link stingers.ca/news.php?id=1587 So I attended one game and as I was sitting in the stands watching the Stingers play as a simple spectator for the first time in a long time, I found myself happy to be seeing my former players but not wishing I was on the other side of the field coaching. At different points of this past season, when I do the team was playing, I would look outside and see it raining, or being cold, or thinking how the team was playing in Quebec City and wouldn't be back until 2am and I found myself being happy I didn't have to deal with that. I don't miss the sleepless nights after a tough loss as I replay the game in my mind, second guessing decisions I made and how I might have managed the game differently. I don't miss it, because in my mind I have already dealt with the reality that I was coming to the end of my coaching career. After the initial realization that I would no longer be coaching, I wanted for the disappointment to hit, it didn't. I thought maybe when I read about training camp starting, I would feel nostalgic, I didn't, when the season would start, again , didn't miss it. The earth didn’t open up. Fireballs didn’t rain from the sky. It was almost so uneventful that I was nervously waiting for something to happen around every corner. But it didn’t. It just goes to show how dramatically we can build something up in our mind only to find out it wasn’t nearly that big of a deal in the first place. Did I feel a bit of an identity loss? I did. It would be a lie to say I didn’t, but one thing I didn’t feel was regret. I didn’t regret retiring from coaching because I didn’t want to start over with another team, or organization, but I did feel like something got the better of me, which is a tough pill to swallow. For so long, people identified me as Jorge Sanchez, soccer coach. I would be introduced to people by mutual friends who would say, " Did you know Jorge coaches soccer at Concordia?" or friends, co-workers and acquaintances would ask " So how's the season going?" or " How's the team looking this year ? " and in all cases, I would just respond " I am not coaching anymore, I'm retired." There was a certain weird feeling to hearing myself say the words out loud. Aside from realizing how peaceful I was with walking away from coaching, I realized the over-inflated role sports can take in our lives. Don’t get me wrong! Sports can teach us valuable life lessons , I’ll never dispute that, but we can learn these same life lessons elsewhere as well. Sometimes we build up sports as a life-and-death thing. If we don’t win, we become pretty devastated. Then we get extra nervous before matches because we want to avoid this devastation should we lose. Coaching will always be a huge part of my personality and life experience, you don't spend 27 years doing anything, giving as much time and effort as I gave it and have it not be very important but I know that I can find something else to fill my time. I am not longer defined by being " soccer coach". I used to get meaning from coaching a game. How sad is that? Why couldn’t I get meaning from talking to my parents, or helping my younger brother, or volunteering in my community in other forms. Why can't I now? Coaching is great and it can play a role in many lives but it remains coaching a game. I am not curing disease, saving lives or coming up with some invention that will improve mankind. Yes, you are encouraging and helping others achieve their goals. Now I try to define myself by how much I can help other people by connecting with them, spending time with them, and encouraging them. I define myself by writing. I feel no greater purpose than when someone tells me they felt better after reading something I wrote. And while it seems like I’m bashing sports a lot in this article, I want you all to realize that I do love sports dearly. I have sports to thank for how far I’ve gotten and the constant ambition in my gut.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorAfter many years of coaching at various levels and with different teams, I thought I would share some of my experiences and thoughts about coaching. Archives
January 2023
Categories
All
|