You’ve read everything he or she's ever written, seen everything he or she's ever done. He or she has changed your life and the way you think. You feel a solidarity with this certain person or maybe a few people that you feel is unique. When at last you meet, there will be an instant connection, and the two of you will become lasting friends. At least, that’s what many people think when they imagine having the chance to meet their idol or hero, or maybe just getting to meet a celebrity.
People interchange the words like idol, hero, or celebrity to indicate someone famous, a public figure of sorts that can be someone we dream about meeting just for the chance to rub shoulders with someone who has a public profile, or maybe because this individual, by their existence, their accomplishments or their life's philosophy have somehow impressed you or maybe had an impact on your life. So have I ever gotten to meet someone famous? Through my professional career in various environments and my involvement in coaching, I have the opportunity to come across quite a few public figures from a wide range of professions, athletes, coaches, actors (actresses), politicians, media personalities and others. Some were very well known by the public and some had more of a niche reputation within their specific fields. I can't say that I have ever met someone I would consider a hero or an idol but certainly I have met a number of people that I would say I admired and in some cases strongly admired. And yes, like many people, I still have a kind of bucket list of people I hope to one day admire. I won't sit here and name drop everyone I met, but let's just say for the most part my experiences have been rewarding although some did turn out to be a little different than their public persona, or at least my perception of what they were like. Truth be told, when I have met these people, it has usually been through an event or situation that I and the public figure in question has been a part of. On occasion, I have crossed a public figure on the street or at a restaurant, and very rarely have I taken the initiative to introduce myself or acknowledge that I recognized them. Yes, sometimes it has been due to being shy but at the same time, I have often held the belief that even public figures are entitled to their personal time. I didn't want to be another one of many who might interrupt their personal time to gush about how I knew who they were or that I enjoyed their ( fill in the blank). Like anyone else, I've had my fan moments when I came across a public figure and felt awed, nervous or shy about the prospect of getting the chance to speak with them. In the age of social media interaction, like many people, I have tagged public figures , exchanged comments even shared a few DMs all via twitter. Some public figures have even liked, retweeted or responded to my tweets. Does this makes us connected, is it a sign that there could be some sort opening for there to be a relationship of some sort? Most likely, the answer is no ! I’ve stumbled and bumbled a few times when meeting public figures, especially those that I really admired or respected. As I've said, I have often shied away from approaching a public figure, and then regretted it. This is usually followed by some sort of commitment that "next time" I will be bold and step up because as the saying goes, "you can't win a raffle if you don't buy a ticket". But one thing my experiences have taught me is that just because there are a few exchanges on social media, this in no way makes you unique, and that what makes a public figure interesting, a celebrity or admired isn't only about who they are as people, but often might be more about what they do, what they have accomplished. One thing I will say, and I will try to put in practice that next time I cross a public figure I admire and would like to have some sort of personal interaction with is, do what it takes, overcome shyness, worry about offending or interrupting. If introducing myself is that important, then I should do it. I can't control how the person will react, but I can control not regretting after the fact that I didn't try. I mean it. If meeting someone when a chance presents itself is that important then why wouldn't I do everything in MY power to meet this person. Who knows how many opportunities I will have in the future? In the end, I have enjoyed most of the moments I got to exchange with a public figure but I have often lamented the missed opportunity to meet someone when a clear cut chance presented itself and the sole reason it didn't happen was directly linked to my own indecision or inactivity. So great that's my story but what does this all mean ? Chances are very good that at some point in your life you’ll meet someone famous. It could be an actor, a musician, or a professional athlete. Or perhaps a VIP of another sort, like a well-known politician, a media personality, an author or someone who is publicly known for works of charity. So when the opportunity presents itself, you have a decision to make: do you want to be viewed as just another fan or would you like to take a shot at developing a professional or even personal relationship? The answer to that question determines how you should handle the situation. In many instances, the venue in which you meet the celebrity simply won’t allow any sort of meaningful conversation. If there is a crowd of people vying for the person’s attention then you probably just need to grab an autograph and get a picture for Facebook. But if you have the opportunity to actually engage in conversation, there are ways to make yourself memorable. And when the change to meet someone famous actually happens ? Don’t dwell on the reason for the person’s fame, at least not initially. It’s tempting, especially if you’re a die-hard fan to fall back on one the typical lines like " I'm a huge fan" but for someone who famous, that simply implies to them that you are simply “just another fan.” You want to stand out, try breaking the ice with a question or comment that is different and personal. Common ground makes for a good conversation starter. It's hard when we meet a public figure we admire not to put them on some sort of pedestal, to automatically differ to them and forget about who we are. We might actually forget something as basic as introducing ourselves and giving our name, something we do regularly anytime we meet new people at work or in our social lives. It might not seem important, but it is. Although they might not remember and keep track of who you are, this interaction is important for you. Do not say to yourself that this person will not care. Remember beyond their social status they are human beings and everyone human being required human interaction and in my humble opinion, introducing yourself with your name is as basic as it gets. When you meet a public figure that you may consider an idol or hero, there is one very important thing to always keep in mind. Although they had had an impact on your life, your idol is human like everyone else. They wake up, go to the dentist, use the bathroom and feel emotion just like the rest of the world. Keep this in mind when considering your physicality and general attitude during your interaction. Do not attack them or treat them like they are some kind of deity. Be happy with a kind smile and simple gratitude, likely that is all you are going to receive. It is easy to have high expectations, but I am here to inform you that if you go in hoping for a magical encounter where the person will pick you out of the crowd and propose, you are incorrect. Be thankful for getting to meet your idol and appreciate the moment while it lasts. Remember, human beings require human interaction. If this public figure really is an idol, someone who had a profound impact on your life, then you should be willing to share this fact with the person, even if only to express your gratitude. Tell them how they impacted your life, did they inspire you to make career choice, or pattern you life in a certain way. If you really believe it, then feel free to express it but keep in mind time may be limited. Most importantly, be yourself, don't try and be someone you're not, Don't embellish, don't try and impress and don't try and stand out. Public figures probably see this constantly, somebody trying to get their attention by trying to grab attention being someone they are not. The best way to stand out is to be yourself and be genuine. this is the best way to seem interesting. Stick with what you know and who you are, because trying too hard to do more can make you look really dumb. So is it always great to meet an idol or celebrity? There are some that say, it is often not a good thing to meet a public figure you admire or an idol, because the deck is stacked against you. That once you meet them, any positive opinion or perception you have will be shattered. And why do some thing this? Well, they would probably answer that when the moment comes to meet with a celebrity one or a few of these will happen without fail. You won’t make an impression. It may be hard to believe, but “I’m your biggest fan,” is about the least impressive thing you can say to someone who hears it almost constantly, in fact, I’m pretty sure most people defer to that very same comment when they meet someone they admire... and hey some might even have a tattoo to prove it. But really, what could ever go wrong meeting a celebrity? well.......... You might embarrass yourself, the moment has come, you've prepared for it and then all of sudden you start babbling like a fool. You decide to tell that story about how your hero gave your life new meaning, but you immediately realize this story is long and uninteresting, so you stop and ask what you think is a really insightful question. He responds with a nod, which, you realize, is all it really deserved since it wasn’t actually a question after all, but now they've moved on and are talking to someone else, you missed your chance. or........ He will be mean or completely different than you always imagined. This might be the greatest moment of your life, but for him or her, this is just another encounter in a line of many encounters with people who idolize them, who share comments about why they are the greatest ( fill in blank ) ever. No doubt, the contrast between your happiness and their indifference will make them come across as mean. But it isn't mean, it's just that you happen to be one of many. Then there is always ......... He will be nice to you. Even worse than finding out your idol is mean is finding out he’s overly nice — like, eager to hear what you have to say. You prepared yourself to say, hi, share a quick comment and that would be it.. but now, this person wants to know more about you and you find yourself unprepared... reverts back to embarrassing yourself. But in the end, it is really possible ............. He or she will seem surprisingly average. Unless you picture your idol as a kind of regular individual with flaws, insecurities, worries, and concerns, like anyone else, OK maybe not like everyone else but still having all of those related to his or her reality. you’ll invariably be disappointed by how simply human they are. They doesn’t exude an aura of greatness, in fact, they seem like someone who watches a lot of sports or series on TV, leaving you to wonder: is this the pinnacle of existence? Is this what I have to aspire to? Because remember, what makes them famous is what they do and the perception they give off from a distance. So what's my point? Well, it is OK to enjoy having idols, or admiring public figures. It's great when you get to meet one that exceeds your expectations and sucks when you might one that disappoints you. However, keep it all in context. Everyone human being has strengths and weaknesses. The important thing is that we be comfortable in our skin and work to be the best version of ourselves. the rest are just moments in our lives.
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AuthorAfter many years of coaching at various levels and with different teams, I thought I would share some of my experiences and thoughts about coaching. Archives
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